6dpt

So, today that faint line is still super faint, but visible. You can't quite see it as well in the picture as you can in real life, but trust me there is a line for sure! The wierd part is that I'm not as excited as I have been in the past to see that little pink line. I guess it's because of the miscarriages...I'm keeping myself from getting too excited until we find out for sure if the pregnancy is viable and will result in a baby and not just a ton of medical bills and a brokenheart.

The line above the "c" is the "control line" that shows the test is working properly... the little line above the "t" is the "test line" and would only show anything if there is hCG (baby hormone) present...

Also, the breakfast burrito cravings have begun... it's 3:30 am right now and I woke up because I was dreaming that I fell into an ocean of hotsauce, but floated to safety on a tortilla life raft... yum.

5dpt...

So... Do you see a line? because I think I do!

So, before anyone gets excited and goes running into the bedroom to jump on the bed shouting "I'm pregnant Ryan!" Let's think this through...

I forgot about this morning's test again, so I'm pretty sure that is just another evaporation line, but then I started thinking: 5days post transfer is the same as 10dpo (days past ovulation) so I could potentially get a positive test right now. So I took another test and timed it perfectly...what do you think?

and then, (just to prove that I'm not crazy), I inverted the colors on both tests ... If it's an evap line, then it won't show up because there is no color in the line, but if it's real it should show up as a faint green line... above the "T"...

and the second test....

A very very faint positive!

Now, just because I'm getting a positive test right now does not mean "I'm going to have a baby" . I've been pregnant before and lost them, so it's not time to celebrate yet...  Also, very few people even know that they are pregnant this early and this could be another chemical pregnancy (no baby just HCG hormones to trigger a pink line) or an ectopic pregnancy (where the embryo implants somewhere other than right where it's supposed to be in my ute and is not viable). So if you are one of my readers... we're going to pretend that I haven't posted all this on the internet and play it cool... kay?

so... SUCCESS!  Now all I have to do is stay pregnant :)

::runs to jump on the bed and wake Ryan up:::

4dpt

a little blurry, but nothing yet :)
stupid evaporation line freaked me out though...

one week left until the blood test!

3dpt (3 Days Post Transfer)

So, no little pink line today. But definitely there's an evaporation line. (Evaporation lines happen when the test starts to dry and you can see the little area where a positive line would be if the pregnancy hormone were present...basically it's another way mind fetus can mess with your head.)

Oh well, wasn't expecting much today anyway :)

Last Embryo Update

Quick Update!

Our embryologist called to give us our final count on frozen embryos: 22 frozen! and the even better news... we don't have to wait almost 2 weeks until the pregnancy test to have sex :)... "a few days should be enough" according to the embryologist! Things are getting better and better, and I even am starting to feel a little pregnant. Rye and I walked through the mall today, and the smell of Mrs. Fields cookies made me wanna toss mine. so gross.  (but I'm sure it's totally in my head... mind fetus has settled in early this cycle.... usually about 8-9 days after I ovulate I'm "sure" that I'm knocked up).

The average time is 3-5 days for an embryo to attach and implant according to Dr. Google, so starting on Day 5 post transfer, I'm going to take a cheapie pregnancy test every morning and post just for fun. We'll see if *anything* shows up before the blood test.

So that's your warning.. there will be pictures of things I have peed on in this blog....

Embryo Transfer!!!

The baby-to-be has landed!

First, we got there and our super sweet nurse came in and told us all about how the procedure was going to go from start to finish so we knew exactly what to expect. She was so nice and seemed to be genuinely excited for us. She gave me a list of post-transfer instructions and a list of drugs that are okay to take during pregnancy. So it looks like no swimming, and no dying my hair after today but we CAN have sex! (After a few days, which is awesome because originally they were saying I might be on pelvic rest afterward for up to the entire pregnancy depending on how many embryos and if there are any complications etc... and this soon to be pregnant girl has some majorly pent up sexual frustration after all the shots and abstaining the last couple weeks!) 

   So after the Nurse prepped us, our Embryologist, Andrea, came in with doctor's order for restricted activity and a stack of pictures of our embryos! Ryan got a little teary-eyed seeing the pictures especially when she piointed out the little mass of cells that would become our baby. He's such a sensitive guy. We got to see each one of the thirty embryos and she explained one by one what was going on in them and which she recommended we transfer (turned out we 17 good quality embryos today). She told us that they are perfectly comfortable transfering 1 or 2 embryos for us because of our history. So Ryan and I had a few minutes to discuss it and we came to the conclusion that we should only transfer one embryo because we really don't want multiples (and having to do another round of IVF with frozen embryos is better than going home with twins or triplets or worse... although we could get our own tv show... "Min and Rye plus 9" ).  The picture to the right is our little embie. The one with the arrow pointing at it is the one bouncing around in my Ute as I type this :)

Next came the acupuncturist, Jeaneane. (She introduced her self to Rye as "I'm the one who's been poking your wife"... "she takes it really well"...  LOL!) We did a treatment and a guided meditation, and just relaxed in the room. We showed her the pictures of our embryos and she oooh'd and ahh'd over them with us for a little bit. Over the course of the 2 hours we were there, a lot of our nurses, assistants, acupuncturist, embryologists and others who had worked with us over the past year came in to wish us luck and give hugs. It really feels like you have a team behind you there . Dr. Kettel and Dr. Hummel has an amazing clinic staffed with dedicated and caring people. I couldn't have asked for a better support team!  Visit their website at http://www.sdfertility.com/.

Finally, Dr. Kettel came in and discussed with us the pros and cons of transfering one or two embryos and completely agreed with our decision to transfer only one. He had me lay back with my feet in the stir ups and watch a screen that was mounted behind him where the embryologist was loading a catheter with our embie using a camera mounted to her microscope. Our embryology nurse from the retrieval, Cori, came in to assist and set up the monitor for us. We got to watch them isolate the embryo, and suck it up into the catheter in the lab as Dr. Kettel and Cori prepped me on the table. It really didn't feel that much worse than a regular pap smear, but it was getting kinda crowded down there with all the people and tools... kinda wierd. A moment or two later, Andrea walked in with the filled catheter and they slowly inserted the tube and released the little ball of sunshine into my uterus. It showed up on the ultra sound as a little ball of light, which was really heart warming.. as corny as it may seem. Check out Rye's video of the transfer... (but don't worry there are no Spike Lee angles of my cookie or anything) you can see her load the catheter and then Rye swings around to catch the actual transfer on the ultra sound screen.
Here's the embryo as she is isolating it in the dish...


And here is the actual transfer...


They printed us a couple copies of the ultrasound showing the little speck, and told us not to move for 30 minutes to let the little guy settle. During the 30 minutes of rest, Jeaneane the acupuncturist came back in and did one more treatment to "welcome the embie home" which was really sweet, and then Ryan and I were left there alone for a while to relax.

So now we are in the 2ww... (2 week wait) until our blood pregnancy test on October 5th. Any suggestions you have to keep me busy so I don't go crazy during the next two weeks would be much appreciated!  I'm tempted to buy a bunch of dollar store pregnancy tests and take one each day to post just as an experiment.. What do you think?

Embryo Update #3 & #4

Quick update!

Yesterday, the embryologist called and told us that some of our embies had caught up so we had 30 decent looking embryos!

Today, we have 17 that are "good" with no fragmentation, and 8 that aren't looking so good, and 5 more that are of "fair" quality.

Transfer is tomorrow at 9:15 am! I'm going to do acupuncture before and after the transfer, then it's two weeks of waiting until the pregnancy test. Most likely, we'll be transfering 2 embryos and freezing the rest for later kids.

Hurry Up October 5th!

Embryo Update #2

So I had 45 eggs retrieved.
Of those 45, 36 were mature enough to fertilize.
Of those 36, all of them were fertilized using ICSI (Inter-Cytoplasmic Sperm Injection)
29 fertilized and became embryos.
26 are still multiplying.
22 of them have a rating of "Good" with 4 cells with no wierdness going on, 4 of them were rated "Fair".

 So we are going to do our transfer on Friday (Day 5 Blastocyst Transfer) and hopefully we'll get a postive test on 10/5.

So excited!

Embryo Update #1

Quick Update:

Out of the 45 eggs retrieved, only 36 were mature enough to fertilize and of those 36, 29 fertilized...
so 29 embies! That number will slowly go down as the weaker embryos will die off and the unhealthy ones will become apparent to the embryologists who will separate them from the healthy ones. Tomorrow is decision day where we find out when and how many embryos will be transfered.

Also, my doctor's assistant called and told me I am at high risk for OHSS( Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome) so they are concerned and she gave me another prescription for something to take orally that is supposed to prevent it, and also told me I'd have to do 4 more days of Cetrotide Injections just in case. So that's kind of lame, but overall everything is going better than expected. I'm feeling a lot better and I plan on going in to work for a little while today. After work, I'm headed down to San Diego for my acupuncture appointment and we'll see if that helps the bloating and the pain (I only had to take one vicodin right after I got home yesterday, but since then the pain has been generally bearable).

Thanks for reading! Ryan and I really appreciate all the well wishes and support :)

This is not one of our embryos, but this is how they look right now... two pro-nuclei indicating successful fertilization!

Egg Retrieval!

Back from the egg retrieval! First, Rye and I got to the fertility center about an hour before our surgery time for check in. When we got there, they told me to take my zofran tablet (to prevent nausea from the anesthesia) and they called us into the surgery center to prep. I had been advised not to eat or drink anything 8 hours before the surgery, and I did not sleep at all last night so I was tired and anxious, but the wonderful nursing staff was so patient  and comforting that I felt at ease as soon as they pulled us back to the prep room. They had me change into a hospital gown, socks, and a hair net thing (which Ryan laughed at, of course). Then, they sat me in a massage chair to wait for the Anesthesiologist to come in and start my IV. After that was done, Rye and I sat there for a little bit (playing air ping pong which is waaaay entertaining when you're a little loopy from no food and no sleep) and then they sent Rye to provide his "sample". When I got into the actual operating room, the had me lay on the table, and they noticed that my IV had pulled out (probably from my winning backhand swing during our air ping pong game... oops) so they tried to re insert the IV, but after 3 tries they gave up and decided to use the gas stuff first so that I wouldn't have to sit through so many needle pokes. I took about 6 deep breaths and I was out! In no time at all, I woke up in a recovery room with an oxygen mask. I was shivering pretty bad so they wrapped me up in a big warm inflatable blanket, so when Rye came in, he laughed at me and took another picture.

So the results: out of the 28-30 follicles that had been growing, we got 45 eggs! Even the nurse said that was a really high number so we are really excited at our chances of having enough mature eggs. That also brings a higher risk for OHSS (Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome) where my body starts to retain fluid around my ovaries and is potentially fatal. But we were told to keep an eye on my weight (weight gain of more than 2 lbs per day is a warning sign) and drink lots of water to help prevent this.  The embryologist is going to be calling us everyday to give us an update on our embryos and we are expecting the transfer to be on either wednesday or friday this week.

I'm feeling really really sore and bloated, but overall the experience was not that traumatic. We are so lucky to have such an attentive and caring staff at the San Diego Fertility Center. They said in the next couple days, I'll probably feel worse before I feel better, but it's totally worth it to know that there's a real good chance I'm going to be a mommy soon. I'm going to give my acupuncturist a call tomorrow to see if she can fit me in because it was recommended to us to relieve some of the bloating and pain.

So excited! I'll give quick updates over the next couple days about how our little embryos are doing.

We have our blood pregnancy test on October 5th so ::fingerscrossed:: for us  :) 

We are one step closer to being parents!

Time to Trigger!

*This is a short update because I just want to go lay in bed and not move around anymore*
I had my last monitoring ultrasound and bloodwork appointment today. I trigger tonight at exactly 11:15pm with my HCG shot which will tell my ovaries to do the final maturing of whatever eggs are inside my 28 grape-size follicles and we go in for the Egg Retrieval surgery on sunday morning at 11:15am! They time the trigger shot and egg retrieval excactly 36 hours apart so that the eggs are ready to ovulate but do not before they can collect them. I'm very excited, but also in a lot of pain. My ovaries hurt like they have never hurt before, and I have definitely never been this sore around ovulation on clomid. When I walk around at work, I can feel my poor swollen grapefruit ovaries bouncing around... needless to say it isn't very pleasant.. but it will definitely be worth it in the end :)

Here's a video my doctor has on their website that explains what I'm doing on sunday...


Next step is the ER (egg retrieval) followed by the ET (embryo transfer) either 3 or 5 days later depending on how well the embryos are growing. So the cool thing is this time next week, I'll be pregnant! (well, there will be embryos inside my uterus, but whether they choose to implant or not isn't under my control but I like to pretend...)

One day closer to being a mommy!

Day 7 Grapefruit Stage

I went in for another monitoring appointment today, but this time my fabulous mother-in-law went with me. I am seriously lucky. Between my husband, my brothers, and my in-laws, I have a hugely supportive and loving family. There's still about 28 follicles developing except now they are in the 14-17mm range (they only have to be 18-20mm for the retrieval... you can see three or four in the ultrasound pic, they look like big black circles).

 So it feels like I have two large grapefruit in my belly just bouncing around. I had a full day at work today, and boy was I hurting. Speaking of side effects... I've been having crazy *inappropriate* dreams probably because I'm feeling like a cat in heat because of the hormones and Rye is gone until friday so I'm pretty much out of luck until my man candy comes home. I started Menopur and Cetrotide tonight too (to prevent me from ovulating early and to make sure the eggs mature in time for the retrieval). So now we're up to 8 pills, and 2 shots every night until the egg retrieval which is looking like it will be either sunday or monday, followed by the embryo transfer late next week! So excited! I was going to post a picture of the centrotide/menopur needle, but I decided not to. It's really big, and I didn't want to look at it any longer than I had to.  This is the best I could do for now...

One day closer to mommyhood!

Growth Update and Acupuncture

First, I really gotta say that my absolute favorite thing about going to a Fertility Center instead of a regular doctor is the husbands. There's always some dude avoiding eye contact with everyone because the plastic bag he's clutching contains a tupperware of his "sample". Rye even thinks it's funny how embarassed these guys are... when Rye had to "produce a sample" he came practically skipping in holding the little cup over his head like the olympic torch! I'm honestly surprised he didn't have the olympic theme music playing on his blackberry.
So... monitoring appointment. This time, Rye waited in the exam room while I had my blood drawn. We got to see one of our regular people for the ultrasound (the same lady who laughed at us for like 10 minutes a couple weeks ago when Rye had said that we wouldn't need to freeze any sperm... because he is "full of sperm".. LOL) I was really hoping for like 6-8 good size follicles. I drank lots of water, and I tried not to stress, and apparently it worked REALLY well because I have 11 follicles in my left ovary and 17 in my right! That's 28 potentially egg-bearing follicles! Holy crap! I was feeling really achy and bloated, and I thought maybe it was all in my head, but no... I have almost 30 pebble sized follicles in me. No wonder I'm not feeling normal. And it's the most frustrating thing to feel this bloated and un-sexy as a result of the same medication that's making me both super turned on and batshit crazy simultaneously. Poor Ryan... poor IVF husbands all over the world!

I also had my first Acupuncture treatment this morning. It was so relaxing. First the lady talked to me about what she's going to do for about 15 minutes, and then she had me undress and lay across this table with towels to drape over me. When she came back in, she placed the needles in my legs, arms, stomach and my ear (which were completely painless...in fact I instantly relaxed after she put one in my hand) and then talked me through a guided meditation while she lit a charcoal thing and wafted it over the needles. It was wonderful! I laid there with some soft yoga-like music for what seemed like days, and then she finished by giving me a little massage and a CD of IVF specific guided meditations to take home. The wierdest thing that happened was when she placed the needles in my stomach(see the pic), I felt this really strong heat around where my ovaries are... freaked me out a little bit. When I got up, I definitely felt heavier in the middle and I'm a little more achy now but she said it was from the increase in blood flow to the area.  I have another growth check on Wednesday, and Rye is going to be out of town for work so I think my Mother-in-law is going with me. Looks like I'll be triggering sometime this weekend, and going in for the egg retrieval early next week. So excited!

One day closer to mommyhood!

Day 3 of Injections

I just gave myself my third Gonal-F injection. The second injection was just as hard as the first one. It's the funniest thing watching Rye get nervous watching me stick myself...he sits with me for every injection and yesterday he asked "what's the hold up"  as I was about to do it. He tends to get diarrhea of the mouth when he's nervous :)  So far, the only real side effects I've noticed is that I feel a little bloated/belly-heavy and I've been noticing that Rye's been looking especially yummy lately... I think the meds are making me a little friskier than usual (I told you I'd share everything... even the TMI stuff). I've already gained 2 pounds, and the doctor said weight gain is another side effect of the shots. Hopefully this first round of In Vitro will work and I won't be worrying about the weight I gain anyway. Tonight, I used the last of a vial of the Gonal-F, so I had to mix with a new vial to get the right dose. I think I may have bumped the glass with the needle in doing so, because when I went to inject, it would not go in! I even tried to do it in a stabbing motion, and it still wouldn't pop through the skin... it was really strange. I ended up having to transfer the Gonal-F to a new syringe and try it again. It finally worked, but now I have all of these little red marks on my belly where I tried to stick the first one in. Lame.

On Monday, I will go in for another monitoring appoinment, ultrasound, bloodwork, and acupuncture. I'm super excited. The days seem to be flying by as we go through this whole process.

It also occurred to me that in keeping up this blog, anyone who reads this will know about the success or failure of IVF#1  the day I get the call. So just for future reference, if it is a success, given my history of miscarriages, we plan on keeping the pregnancy super quiet (other than this blog) until we hit a point where we feel confident that the pregnancy is healthy and will result in a baby. If it doesn't work, we'll be super open to comments and questions about it. Just FYI...

Anyways, we are one day closer to parenthood!

I DID IT!! (the first injection)

HOLY CRAP! I just stuck myself with a needle! That was by far the strangest thing I have ever done to myself...well the strangest thing I've done to myself involving a needle... if you don't count tattoos. All day today I was working up the courage to do it. I was counting down the hours and minutes starting at "14hours 30minutes" when I woke up this morning. Thank goodness Ryan was home in time to be there for moral support! I set up on the dining room table next to my big box-o-drugs and set everything out. I was totally cool getting everything ready, but by the time I mixed the Gonal-F and loaded up the injection needle, I was sweatin like a whore in church. My hands were shaking pretty bad too which definitely didn't help my confidence in being able to stick myself without a horrible mess up. I kept having this image of the needle breaking off under my skin or an air bubble getting into my blood stream or some catastrophic and fatal mistake like that. But, I finally did it, and was pleasantly surprised to find that I didn't even feel the needle go in! The only discomfort was a little bit of burning as I pushed the medicine in (I'm pretty sure I pushed it in way too fast), but other than that it was completely pain free :) So all my worrying and stalling were for nothing.

and lucky for you, Ryan caught it all on video...



My next monitoring appointment is on monday. I'll find out if the shots are working and they may or may not change my dose of Gonal-F. I also made an appointment with the fertility acupuncturist that works with my doctor. I'm going in after my monitoring appointment for a 2 hour session of needle pokes and massage to balance my Chi. I'm kind of a hippy-dippy type of person so I'm excited to try acupuncture, and the fact that Dr. Kettel's staff highly recomends this practice makes me feel more at ease with the idea of letting someone turn me into a human pin-cushion. I'm hoping the lady is nice enough to let me take some pictures while she works or even a video... we'll see. 

According to morphthing.com, this is what our kids would look like... so I guess this is why I'm doing all of this:

One shot closer to mommyhood!

Baseline Appointment

7:45am is entirely too early to have to go through the whole dildo-cam experience. It was a Physician's Assistant I had never met before too, so on top of being cold, naked from the waste down and nervous about the whole thing,  I was facing a stranger armed with an ultasound wand. But everything went alright, so I guess I can't really complain. My uterine lining was 4mm (as thin as it's supposed to be at this point in the my cycle) and both ovaries were cyst-free with a few little follicle "wanna-bes" that will most likely develop eggs over the next couple weeks.
Here's a picture of my right ovary (although you really can't see anything at this angle).

After the ultrasound, I went to have some blood drawn. The lady was really really nice, but couldn't get into the vein so she was kinda digging around with the needle in my arm. She gave up and then tried to get a vein in my hand, but still no success... but she gave Rye a knarly case of the woozies. His face went completely pale while she was moving the needle around in my hand and he looked like he was going to pass out! But being the trooper he is, he just toughed it out and tried to say he was fine so I wouldn't worry. Next time, maybe he can wait down the hall while I get poked.

Tonight, Rye and I both start our Azithromycin pills (for 3 days), and tomorrow I start the shots. I'm going to record giving myself the first Gonal-F injection and post it. So check back tomorrow night for a fun video documenting what a huge wuss I am :)

and just for fun, here's a video about the actual IVF procedure...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcJWPWb2uBs

One step closer to mommyhood!

I got my meds!

So I have a big box of drugs in my living room now. It's like christmas for a crack whore. Seriously...

The Meds:

• Prenatal Vitamins
• Folic Acid 4mg daily
• Baby Aspirin 81mg daily
• Loestrin (Birth Control Pills)
• Azithromycin (Antibiotic for both of us)
• Gonal-F Injections Daily (Follicle Stimulating Hormone)
• Cetrotide (for Egg Maturing) mixed with Menopur (Follicle stimulating and luteinizing hormone)Injections Daily
• HCG/Lupron Injection 36 hours before Egg Retrieval
• Syringes
• 2 Sharps containers
• Zofran Capsule at Egg Retrieval
• Estrace (Estrogen Tablet)
• Prometrium Tablets (for Uterine Lining)
• Endometrin Suppositories (also for uterine lining)
• Doxycycline at Embryo Transfer
• Prednisone at Embryo Transfer
• Vicodin as needed for pain

Yep... BIG box of drugs and needles. The wierd thing is, I actually feel better now that I've seen the actual needles I'll be using. We're almost excited to get injecting finally! After three years of waiting, Ryan says it's time to"shit or get off the pot!"  I love his enthusiasm... we'll see how excited he is if the procedure goes too well and we end up with triplets...Lol.

The next step is my baseline appointment on wednesday morning. They're going to do an ultrasound and draw some blood to make sure there's no activity or cysts in my ovaries before I start the injections. So excited!

Back from Injection Training...

First, the paperwork. Let me just start by saying you definitely don't know the strength of your relationship until you start talking about it's demise. IVF usually results in many embryos, so you implant a number of "fresh" ones and freeze the rest for another cycle or another child. We had to go through all the different scenarios that could possibly happen (death, divorce or incapacitation of one or both of us) and decide what to do with our little snow flakes in each case. Our options were to destroy them, donate them to research, donate them to medical training, or donate them to another couple.  After that, we had to discuss what to do if too many embryos implanted or split into twins ( I have no intention of being the next octomom and our options were to go through with the pregnancy and hope for the best, or elect to have a multi-fetal pregnancy reduction which is where the doctor chooses the weakest baby or babies and stops their heart. My body would just resorb the chosen babies and the others would be unaffected). So many very very hard questions so early in the morning! I have to say that Rye's level of concern and dedication to me and our babies-to-be is amazing and I seriously lucked out when it comes to having someone by your side while you go through something this scary and invasive.

So, after signing a million pages of consent forms and scenarios, we were lead back to a tiny little room with a box of needles on the desk. The Doc's assistant came in and went over all the medications and how to mix them. My main medication is Gonal-F (this is the drug that will stimulate multiple eggs to grow in both of my ovaries) and it comes in a little box with a syringe, a little vial of powder, a huge thick needle (that scared the bejeesus out of me until she explained) that is used to mix the medication, and a little needle to attach for the actual injection. I'm going to be injecting 225units of Gonal-F  in my stomach or outer thigh every night between 8-10pm starting September 9th. Then, after they give me the go ahead at one of my many many monitoring appointments I will start injecting Centrotide(prevents ovulation before the egg retrieval surgery) and Menopur (also helps grow eggs) every night as well. These meds will be mixed together in the same way I will have to mix the Gonal-F except the needle is way longer.

Luckily, I didn't have to practice the injections today. So, we were sent off to enjoy the rest of our day and to "try not to stress"... lol.  (Fat chance lady! Did you not see the size of those needles?)
The next step is our Baseline appointment on the 8th where they will do a blood test and an ultrasound to make sure the BCPs did their job of "quieting" my ovaries. The idea of quieting my ovaries always puts this image of to organs talking to eachother in a library... yeah, I giggle everytime. I'm going to try to post a calendar so you can see what my IVF cycle will look like as well as some pictures of the needles and the meds... thinking about posting a video of the first injection... but still not sure if I want my wimpery to be posted all over the inter-webs... 

For Rent: Empty Uterus. 9 month lease. Utilities Included.

After 33 cycles, 3 miscarriages, and a diagnosis of Unspecified infertiltiy, Hubby and I decided to go ahead with IVF. Needless to say, I've become a little bitter ( I've been known to make visibly pregnant woman uncomfortable in grocery stores as I stare intently at their baby bumps like fertility is contagious or something). Last friday, Hubby and I sat in an ice cold room watching the "Is IVF right for you?" video in our doctors office. We decided yes. Yes, it would be worth the second mortgage, the nightly self injections, and insanity caused by the meds all because ultimately this would be our best (and probably only) chance to create the family we've been dreaming of since before we got married.

I began to search the internet for videos and research about young women and IVF ( I'm 25), but it turned out there aren't very many 25 year olds who have the stable relationships, the disposable income or the fertility issues to warrant IVF. So I'm going to try my best to document everything as completely and unapologetically as I can. I won't spare a single TMI detail in the hopes that someone will be able to read these posts and get a real picture as to what so many of us young, fertility-challenged women may have to go through just to have the family  "happily ever after" has always promised us.

So far, I've been taking a concoction of pills including prenatal vitamins, folic acid, baby aspirin and birth control pills. (I know, the BCPs seemed counter-intuitive to me too... but supposedly they "quiet" the ovaries in preparation for stimulation) I stop the BCPs on sunday, then start nightly Gonal-F injections for 8-15 days with ultrasound appointments every other day or so to monitor how my eggs are growing. Once the eggs are ready to be retrieved, I give myself a trigger shot and plan to go under 36 hours later for egg retrieval. 3-5 days later I go back for the embryo transfer and ::fingerscrossed:: I get knocked up and stay knocked up. Well, that's the plan anyway.
Tomorrow is my injection class where they teach me to give myself the Gonal-F shots.  I'll let you know how that goes...